You can't...

always get what you want / But if you try sometimes you might find / You get what you need

That was my theme song today.

This lingering cold was in the "coughing every ten seconds" stage this morning, so I was pretty unhappy and tired.  I took some Dayquil, laid down "for a minute" and fell asleep for like three more hours, haha.

When I woke up in the afternoon, it was cold, my stomach was literally growling, and I still felt a bit sick.  I thought about every single one of these things as possible excuses to go eat some garbage.  I wanted it, but underneath, I didn't want it either. 

I know "too" well now that binging won't solve anything, but only make it worse.  That maybe I'd feel better for however long it lasted, but maybe not even that long, and I'd assuredly feel worse afterwards.  So my only option was to not.

I had less stamina to work out.  I concentrated on form, took breaks when I had to, and muttered that song under my breath.  But if you try . . . you might find you get what you need.

I didn't eat a salad today.  I feel bad, but at the same time I don't want to let myself feel too bad because things were good if not great.  I want to improve at that still, but I don't want to get so wrapped up in doing things "right" that it discourages me, either.

It was a good day, a good first week for the CDC Challenge.  I said no to the bad things I wanted and yes to what I needed, and I am glad that I did.  My body doesn't understand the long-term very well- it only knows what it wants to eat or that it wants to laze about, now.  But I do; I know better.  I am stronger than it, too.

Tomorrow is dinner at someone else's house.  I asked if I could bring my own meal.  Maybe it'll be awkward... okay, it will.  I'll look at other peoples' plates and want what they're having instead.  But these wants are fleeting, they're distractions.

What I really want is to be healthy and to feel good about myself.  It's also what I need, and it is happening one mealtime, craving, and set of reps at a time.  One day. 

Don't stop, don't give up.  Keep trying, we can do this.

Exercise: Insanity, Day 8 (Cardio Power & Resistance)
Eating: 1,066 calories; 5 quarts water (5.5 by the time I posted this, haha)